Last night the F-Bomb was dropped at our house. It wasn’t set off from some top-secret location in the desert that may or may not exist. It was launched directly and very pronounced from the mouth of our 2-year-old little girl.
Let me set the scene for you. Kendall was freshly bathed and dressed in her princess pajamas. Daddy had just helped her brush her teeth, and I was about to jump in the shower. Enter the dog. We have a seven-year old Australian Shepherd. Kendall loves the big hair ball, and he loves her. Well, she usually loves him. Last night, however, he was in her way. She was trying to get down the stairs, and the dog was blocking her path. So she did what any girl would do. She yelled for Daddy. He patted the dog’s head, told him to move and picked her up. He said something to the effect of the crazy dog being in her way and turned to go downstairs.
Then it happened.
Cover your head. Head for your safe room. The sweet little girl hit the big red button and the bomb took off.
“Cause he’s a “f-ing” idiot!”
My jaw probably hit the carpet as I popped my head back around the corner. Dumbfounded, Adam asked her what she said. Rule #1, never ask a two-year old to repeat the naughty word. At the request of her father, she said it again. “He’s a “f-ing” idiot!” At that my husband lost it. Rule #2, don’t laugh uncontrollably at a toddler doing wrong. She thought it was great! He thought it was hilarious. I was hiding in the bathroom so she couldn’t see my face.
This was not her first trip down that road. One morning, she was helping Daddy do dishes and stated in a very matter of fact tone that she had to pull up her sleeves or Mommy would be pissed. Where do they get this shit? I mean stuff… I am sure that this particular statement was a direct quote from her father at some point.
Daddy did sit down with her and explain that it wasn’t a good word to say. She told both of us she was sorry and promised not to say it again. Most importantly, her and the dog were best friends again before bedtime. Apparently, when you’re a dog you can recovery quickly from being an idiot.
After some serious thought and a few more laughs I’ve determined a few things on the situation.
- I’m a little shocked it took this long for the F-Bomb to top here.
- It happened for the first time in our home, not in public.
- She directed it at the dog and not at me!
There you have it. Just another random Thursday night at our house. Way better than any Thursday night at the bar in college. Just like every parenting situation, I’m sure we aren’t alone in this. How old was your child when the bomb was dropped?